Quarantine Screen Time: How to Find Balance
This is the first time that parents are dealing with two pandemics at once: COVID-19 and screen time. Prior to the “Stay at Home” orders, parents were already battling with managing screen time with their kids, and now that kids have moved to strictly remote learning, parents are finding themselves forced to give more screen time to their kids. I completely get it. You will do anything to prevent a bored, and cooped up kid from going stir-crazy, but as the parent-guilt sets in you starting wondering, “how much is too much?”
Unfortunately, there isn’t a clear-cut answer to this since every kid is different and every family has their own set of values and priorities. The good news is, we created a list of 6 helpful tips for you to follow during this uncharted time.
Structure
This might be the most important tip in this list. Creating structure for screen time will prevent the constant nagging and pestering of your kids asking for screen time. If they know when it is expected, and you are firm on sticking to this schedule, it creates predictability and consistency for them, which kids thrive off of! If you give your child screen time at random, ambiguous times, then you are setting yourself up for a child who is forced to ask until it is given. Think of the slot machines at Las Vegas. It becomes addicting because of intermittent reinforcement, or random reinforcement. You will keep putting money in hoping this time will be the lucky time. Your child will do the same if there is no consistency and structure around screen time; they will keep asking hoping this time will be the lucky time you give in and say yes. Prevent this through structure.
Timing
Pick and choose the best times to schedule screen time and use this time to your advantage. Save screen time for the moments where you need alone time for work, chores, self-care, or plain old peace and quiet! This will help you to feel less guilty about giving your child screen time because you are using it as a parenting tool rather than a babysitter.
Content
Be mindful of the type of screen time you are giving your child. It’s okay to let them have fun and play video games of their choice (within reason), but sprinkle in some educational, creative, or social games that will help to stimulate their brain. With remote learning, some kids are not receiving the same level of mental challenge that they were when they were in school, so screen time could be a great opportunity to provide more brain challenges and socialization throughout their day.
Expectations
During this fluid time, it is important to throw out any old expectations you had around parenting, especially in regards to screen time. The truth is screen time will inevitably increase during quarantine for everyone, especially children, so you are only setting yourself up for disappointment by holding yourself to the old expectations you had pre-quarantine. Let your child know that the expectations are changing as you adapt to this period of time and once children are back to their normal routines, so will the screen times. Until then, you and your family will need to discover your ‘new normal,’ which will require flexibility and patience.
Monitor
Continue to monitor your child’s mood and behaviors as you increase screen time. If you notice an uptick in their behaviors or if they are becoming more irritable, then maybe reconsider limiting screen time. Same goes for the opposite. If you don’t notice a change and they seem to be okay with increased screen time, then that is a sign that it is likely okay. You know your child best, so you will know if the benefits of screen time outweigh the cons.
Balance
Sometimes there is too much focus on screen time and how much or little we should be giving our child when really the focus should be on how you can fill up your child’s life with more meaningful activities. Scheduling in other activities or hobbies for your child to do will inevitably decrease the need for screen time. I suggest an “Activities Jar” for the families that I work with where they write down different fun activities and they put it in a jar and choose an activity. This can be collaborative since most kids have a difficulty with coming up with other activities besides screen time on their own.
Written By: Dr. Jesi Sasaki, PsyD.
Contact us at learnandburnkids@gmail.com for a 15 minute free consultation on how we can help you during this pandemic.